Every relationship has the occasional spat where both partners choose to lie about something. It will usually be something small, about being busy when they clearly weren’t or making excuses to get out of something that they find boring and can’t cope with. But it is the big lies, the gaslighting, and the constant influx of mendacity in a relationship that weakens it to its very core. One sign doesn’t mean a lot because small lies are the defining mark of humanity; everyone does it. But when it becomes frequent and a chronic propensity, then it is time to fret. A partner that lies a lot and can’t seem to get their stories straight is a red flag, an indication that you are better off without them and should run away from such a relationship. Read on and learn about the signs that show when your partner is not being honest with you right here.
Ever-Changing Stories
One of the biggest indicators of your partner lying is when their stories keep on changing. One moment they might be saying something, and the next, the entire premise and detail will be changed. They distort the facts, and their justifications keep on vacillating, sometimes with timelines, sometimes with explanations, showing that they are not to be trusted any longer.
Giving Too Much Information
You should immediately realize that something is amiss when your partner starts overexplaining their position in response to even the smallest and simplest of questions. The responses feel fabricated, rehearsed, and artificial, but still such a partner persists in trying to convince you of their veracity. These less than convincing arguments are a sign that your partner might be lying to you.
Avoiding Direct Questions
Another thing that you should look out for is when your partners don’t answer your questions directly. Instead, they deflect, laugh it off, or attempt to change the subject entirely. They might even try to answer your question with a question, an inane and openly deflective move on their part.
Getting Defensive Pretty Fast
When your partner becomes irritated and is nettled at the smallest expression of curiosity or further probing from your side, then it is a sign that they might be hiding something. They will grow petulant, resort to sarcasm, and might even openly call you out for interrogating them. This is a classic move employed by people when they want to deflect and escape being questioned.
Reactions Don’t Match the Situation
If your partner laughs and treats serious topics with levity and immaturity or seems weirdly detached to you, then you should be perturbed. This mismatch between their reactions and the actual situations signals some kind of emotional conflict within them, like they have something questionable and infernal to hide from you.
Caring About Technicalities Suddenly
You should be concerned when your partner starts caring about nuances and intricacies like exact wording, the nature of the question being asked, timelines, and so on. This signals something is wrong and that they are harboring a secret, one that they don’t want to share with you.
Blaming You for Being Suspicious
A classic sign of deflection and lying is when your partner openly criticizes you and tries to turn the blame onto you for questioning them. They even resort to calling you suspicious and mistrusting and attempt to gaslight you into believing that you are in the wrong here.
Stalling Before Answering
If your partner takes long pauses before answering, repeats questions back to you, or tries to buy time to fabricate and concoct an answer, then it shows that they are lying to you. They don’t have any genuine response in mind because recalling it is far faster than attempting to contrive one on the spot.
Weird Body Language
If your partner’s body language seems off to you, then it is a sign that they have something to hide from you. You can tell that something is wrong when they smile forcibly and artificially, are furtive and avoid eye contact with you, exaggerate their gestures, or grow still suddenly. These actions and disturbed body language are indicators that something is unnerving them, something that they can’t afford to share with you.
Becoming Selectively Forgetful
You should know something foul is afoot when your partner forgets specific details about the event or question that you are expecting them to respond to. They will conveniently forget only those details that matter in the conversation, a warning that they might have something deeper to hide from you.
Using Absolutes
When a partner uses absolute statements like they would never do something like that or that they tell you, their partner, everything as a countermeasure against further probing, then this shows they are lying.
Changing Their Communication Habits
If a person becomes more secretive and tries to hide behind the shield of privacy more frequently, then this shows something is wrong. They will act with greater secrecy, will keep their phones protected against scrutiny from you, will constantly delete messages, and will become increasingly furtive and protective about details regarding their lives. These are all red flags that should let you know that your partner is lying.
Rehearsing the Same Lines
You start hearing the same phrases again and again from them. It is like rinse and repeat, where they utter the same, tired phrases verbatim to their previous wording as if they have memorized them internally. These scripted lines show that they are lying and hiding something potentially terrible from you.
Acting Relieved When the Topic Drops
Once the subject changes or you change the topic, you will immediately notice the tension leaving their bodies like air from a distended balloon. This sudden vanishing of tension and stress is a sign that they were experiencing internal conflict and consternation over that specific topic only, something that you should be concerned about.
Your Gut Feeling
Sometimes the best judge for identifying whether your partner is lying or not is your instincts. Intuition might not be the absolute truth that you need, but it does allow you to notice certain patterns. When your gut is constantly telling you that something feels off, then perhaps there actually is. You would do well to listen to it under these circumstances.
Final Thoughts
No single behavior can definitively prove that a person is dishonest and is lying. However, when several of these signs show up, then this shows that a person is lying without question or any shred of doubt. You should confront them under these conditions and try to pry the truth out of them through gentle yet firm questioning.
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